dude, where’s my stove?

The good thing about buying an apartment and doing an almost complete gut renovation is that you get to select all of the shiny new things that will make your home beautiful. Everything from the floors to appliances to fixtures is your choice. The less than good thing is that renovations come with many opportunities for schedules to be delayed and communication chains to break down.

And stoves to get lost.

I ordered this gorgeous stove on July 11:

Fisher & Paykel stove

The sales guy told me it would be delivered on July 20. That’s what my invoice says, too. That’s the date I scheduled with the building and submitted a certificate of insurance for and arranged for a contractor to be here to hook it up. But guess what? The stove didn’t arrive on Friday. Even more hilarious is that no one knows where it is. I spoke to a manager at the store twice on Friday. He said he called the buyer and was waiting for a call back. When I spoke to the sales guy Friday evening, he told me the manager never called about the stove. And that he would call them on Saturday. But guess what? They were closed Saturday. Oh, and the sales guy sounded totally drunk on the phone and could barely string a sentence together. Here’s a transcript of the voice message he left me:

“Hey, how you doin’, Susane? This is [name of drunk sales guy] calling from [name of store that is supposed to be reliable but is showing its bootleg colors]. Um…okay [muffled nonsense]…well…right now? [prolonged sigh] The stove…the stove situation…um…right now? We’re not able to figure out when…approximately when the stove is going to be here because we have to call the [manufacturer] and [manufacturer] they’re closed today? I do apologize for the wait. You know. Um. They told me that I have to wait until Monday because it was a whole…pretty much process for them to get to [manufacturer] just to find out they’re closed today…”

Now it’s Monday. Everyone is open. But guess what? Still no answer. Apparently, no one can help me. And we still don’t know where the stove is. TGIM!

I could get really upset about my MIA stove. I could storm into the store and proceed to bust out a loud, cranky rant at customer service. But after living out of boxes for a week, after having boys with tools taking over my place pretty much every day, after having zero privacy and no bathroom door, after being on deadline with no chance to work, and after so many other things did not work out as promised…you have to laugh.

You just have to laugh. And smile out of windows that the sun shines in all day long. And thank the Universe that this big dream of owning a home has finally become reality.

Because the stove will be located. I will get to cook the large quantities of Quorn in my freezer (went a little crazy at Whole Foods after not having a freezer for nine years!). And eventually, one day in the very near future, my apartment will be done. A gorgeous new home that will be both a tranquil oasis for writing books and a bright, welcoming place for friends to chill. Thus, I am tagging this post as both a rant and positive energy.

Thanks for letting me vent, friendly neighbors!

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12 thoughts on “dude, where’s my stove?

  1. Just think of the story your stove will have to tell when it finally arrives – where it’s been, who it’s met. Very exciting!

  2. You have to live without a stove for almost a month? I think that’s against the law or something! Is there anything you can do for a replacement in the meantime?

  3. You are one hilarious person, Susane Colasanti. 🙂 I wish you good luck, and hope that your stove finds your way back to you 😀

    How far did the apartment come out, anyway? Waiting for pictures!

  4. Pingback: doors | Susane Colasanti – Blog

  5. Pingback: home life – kitchen | Susane Colasanti – Blog

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