over and over

Welcome to summer! For lots of people, summer already started on Memorial Day. For me, summer starts on the summer solstice, which was yesterday. Today always involves conflict. You’d think I would recognize this as an established annual event and be unaffected by now, but no. I want to be in the Now and appreciate the season of sunset walks and summer breeze and fireflies. But as of today, daylight hours are decreasing (and will continue to decrease until the day after the winter solstice). I’m trying really hard to erase this knowledge. Every day when I turn on my computer, the first thing I see after my Jim and Pam wallpaper is my daylight hours widget. And every day when I see that sunset is one minute later than the day before, I get all happy. Today sunset is at 8:30. Tomorrow when it’s at 8:29, I’ll just have to try really hard to be in the Now, be excited for summer, be one with seasonal cycles.

Which can be challenging when it rains, like, every single freaking day. The five-day forecast says it’s going to be cloudy with rain all week. Again. There’s been so much rain here that my busted umbrella is a permanent fixture in my bag. Even though I totally yelled at it the other day when we were caught in a torrential downpour and it decided to snap another stretcher. There I was on 5th Avenue, attempting to convince my umbrella to work with me just one more day. Curiously, no one walking by thought having a conversation with an umbrella was unusual.

I keep saying I have to get a new umbrella. But then the next day it rains some more and I need the one I have and I’m unmotivated to get another one, even though I end up all drenched again. It’s become a bad habit. Or maybe it’s a routine by now. I’ve been thinking about routines lately. Specifically, the ones we feel like we have to do every day even though we totally don’t. There’s this ep of All in the Family where Archie is arguing with Mike about the right way to put on socks and shoes. Mike goes sock-shoe-sock-shoe. Archie is outraged by this. He insists it must be sock-sock-shoe-shoe. For some reason, I always like to sit on my couch to put socks on, even though my shoes are by the door. If I put on my socks over by my shoes, I just don’t feel right about it.

There are lots of other examples of routines we feel like we have to follow, of course. What’s one of yours?