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This is the last blog post I will write in my 30s.

Oh you heard right. I am entering a shiny new decade to go with this shiny new chapter of my life. Tomorrow is May 1. May Day. My 40th birthday. And I will be celebrating Fabulous at 40 style.

My birthday wasn’t always fun times. My Gram died on my 30th birthday. She was basically my whole family and I had a Knowing she would die on my 30th birthday and then she did and my whole world shattered. Every birthday after that was a nightmare. But then May 1, 2011 happened. Osama bin Laden was killed. And just like that, my birthday was entirely turned around.

Today One World Trade, formerly known as the Freedom Tower, will become the tallest building in the western hemisphere. They were supposed to add the final piece to its spire yesterday, but it was too windy. You can see One World Trade and almost the entire Manhattan skyline from my boyfriend’s place. We watched Zero Dark Thirty last night, One World Trade was sparkling out the window, its reflection shining on the TV during parts of the movie where the screen went black. You know how I love those full-circle moments. If you’ve been reading this blog for a while, you also know that I have a long history with the Twin Towers. And that my friend Stephen and I have walked down to Ground Zero almost every September 11 since 2001. It’s our way of celebrating being alive. I took this photo on our walk down last year:

I don’t only document One World Trade on 9.11, though. Here’s a photo I took last May:

Every day I see One World Trade, I take a minute to breathe in its energy. To remember. To appreciate everything I have and everything yet to come. One World Trade represents strength, resilience, and goodness. This building is a physical manifestation of positive energy. You can feel the energy just by looking at it.

I want to be like One World Trade in that way. I want to help make the world a better place using positive energy. That’s why I’m really looking forward to 40. My teens were the worst years of my life. My 20s were for working out issues. My 30s were focused on self-discovery, career stability, and finding peace. But my 40s? My 40s will be the happiest decade yet, no question. I have a Knowing. That’s why I can’t wait to be Fabulous at 40.

Bring it, 40s. Let’s do this thing.

goodness

Do I have to tell you that it’s been a horrible week? Of course not. The tragedy in Boston was an absolute nightmare. I remember the days and weeks and months after September 11 here in New York. We weren’t sure if another attack was about to happen. Every time I heard a low-flying plane, I braced myself. I avoided taking the subway whenever I could. And I kept my old-school phone with the twisty cord after I got a cordless one just in case I ever need it.

But we eventually emerged from the fear. The depression. The anger. We eventually resumed our normal lives. We will never forget. But we will not let evil dictate who we are. Because if we allow idiots to prevent us from loving life, we encourage more idiots to bust out the crazy. My response to people polluting the world with negative energy is to radiate even more positive energy. So this post is all about the goodness.

1. The first bit of goodness I’d like to share is brought to you by Judi W., first prize winner of the Keep Holding On paperback contest. Her zine cover is super inspirational. Thanks for keeping us where the light is, Judi!

2. You probably know that I’m a massive Flight of the Conchords fangirl. I promise not to go off on a rant about why the best shows ever like Freaks and Geeks and My So-Called Life were only on for one season while mindless shows like America’s Real Hoarder Housewives are on for what feels like an eternity. Flight of the Conchords was only on for two brilliant seasons. It’s just night right, you guys. The loss is palpable.

So how happy was I when my boyfriend took me to the Flight of the Conchords conference room at HBO?

Ah yeah. Goodness squared, baby. All that conference room needs is an oven. Then Jemaine could do the talking oven. “Let’s bake a cake!”

3. You might have heard a rumor that I’m turning 40 on May Day. Not sure how that happened. However, I’ve checked my records and apparently it’s true. I’m not into throwing parties for myself. But this is 40. So I’m having a Fabulous at 40 party at a swanky lounge in Tribeca. Months ago when Fabulous at 40 was in its initial planning stages, I visualized the cake very clearly. Vanilla funfetti cake. Vanilla buttercream frosting. Fabulous written across the cake in hot pink script. Rainbow sprinkles. And instead of candles, one sparkler. Guess what cake we’ll be enjoying at Fabulous at 40? That one! Well, almost. Lady M is doing strawberry shortcake instead of vanilla. Even better. Yay for unexpected goodness.

4. Speaking of birthdays, my all-time fave book, The Little Prince, turned 70 on April 6. I celebrated with these:

Why yes, you are looking at Birthday Cake Good Humor bars. They are new. They are delicious. And these were two for five. Good Humor always brings the goodness. But trust me. These take goodness to a whole other level. Highly recommended.

5. Finally, much exciting book goodness is coming up in the next few weeks. This weekend I’ll be chilling with my fellow book nerds at IRA in San Antonio. Here’s where you can find me. Next week Keep Holding On comes out in paperback on April 23. Stay tuned for more giveaways on Twitter and Facebook. Then I’ll be gearing up for the release of my seventh novel, All I Need, on May 21. Of course I’ll post my event schedule, contests, and related funtivities right here.

Thanks to Willa’s Ramblings for this sweet All I Need review. And thanks to everyone else who snagged advance copies and let me know you enjoyed the book. I’m hoping it will be one of those romantic summer reads that’s perfect for the beach.

Wishing you a beautiful weekend filled with much goodness. Let’s keep us where the light is

wheel

Neil deGrasse Tyson on creating your ideal life:

The problem, often not discovered until late in life, is that when you look for things like love, meaning, motivation, it implies they are sitting behind a tree or under a rock. The most successful people recognize, that in life they create their own love, they manufacture their own meaning, they generate their own motivation.

For me, I am driven by two main philosophies, know more today about the world than I knew yesterday. And along the way, lessen the suffering of others. You’d be surprised how far that gets you.

Happy weekend, friendly neighbors

one million

When people ask if I like my job, I tell them that my job isn’t work. It’s a gift. Confucius said, “Choose a job you love and you will never have to work a day in your life.” That is exactly how I feel about being an author.

Sometimes I can’t believe this has been my job for six years. I’m so thankful the Universe presented this amazing opportunity. And I’m so thankful I was able to be a high school science teacher for ten years before making my career switch. Reaching out to teens and helping them feel less alone is my purpose in life. That’s why I’m here.

I recently found out that I’m approaching one million books in print. Which is all because of you. So I want to say thank you for everything you have done for me. Thank you for reading my books. Thank you for taking the time to write to me with your emails, comments, and tweets. Thank you for sharing your life and letting me know that you feel inspired to turn your dreams into reality.

Thank you for making this life possible. Much love <3

top five warm things

So long, February. Don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

You guys know I don’t do winter. Winter just does not appeal to me. The layering and icy winds and darkness at four something and lack of summer fruit…none of those things are fun. But I have to say, this February wasn’t as harsh. There were only a few bitterly cold days. The month flew by at an unprecedented rate. And there were good things to keep me warm.

Top Five Warm Things

5. New Girl addiction

How can you not love this show? Jess is adorable. Schmidt is adorable. Everyone is freaking adorable. I haven’t seen Season Two yet, but I am so psyched for Jess and Nick to get together that I don’t even mind the spoiler.

4. Lena Dunham’s badass attitude

Speaking of new girls, I’m loving the way Lena Dunham is working it and owning it all over the place. Any chick who is razor smart, impressively articulate, and guaranteed to be the most hilarious person in the room gets my vote as Girl Who We Must Worship. She has the kind of confidence I can only hope to possess one day. I’ve only seen the first season of Girls, but that was enough to become a fangirl for life. LD is an inspiration to girls everywhere.

3. Upcoming All I Need stuff

All I Need comes out on May 21. We had a marketing meeting last week to discuss certain funtivities that Penguin will be busting out in the next three months. Some super exciting stuff is in the works. There will be events. There will be more contests and giveaways. Plus I get to go to both IRA in San Antonio and BEA here in New York. Being a major conference nerd, I am beyond stoked.

2. Fabulous at 40

You know how my internal age is 16? Well, technically I’m 39. About to turn 40 on May Day. Turning 40 will not be the crushing life event everyone says it is. Turning 40 will be epic. In an effort to go with the flow in the most zenlike way possible, I have decided that I will be Fabulous at 40. My teens were the worst time of my life. My 20s were for working through the issues surviving the Worst Time Ever inevitably brings. My 30s were all about dreaming big and achieving a lot of those dreams. Now it’s time to start a fresh decade. Which will have an amazing start…

1. This.

If you’re friends with me on Facebook or follow me on Twitter, you might have seen this photo. No, it’s not a new book cover. Although some friendly neighbors on Facebook were saying it should be. I don’t post much about boys (at least not actual boys in my life, as opposed to celeb boys on my husband list), but I had to post this. My boyfriend likes to document us kissing in classic locations, epic movie scene style. This is us in front of the New York Public Library lion. Why? Because that’s how my BF rolls. He’s a writer. He’s sweet and creative and brilliant. And he’s super romantic. So of course things like this kiss happen. Warm things that make February hardly even noticeable.

Here’s to a March filled with warm things for you

you’ve got the power

In case you missed the billboard I rented about it, I won the raffle at Trader Joe’s.

This is a monumental deal.

What makes winning a raffle monumental? First off, it’s not just any raffle. Trader Joe’s gives you a raffle ticket every time you bring your own bag. Five winning tickets are drawn each week. The prize is a $25 Trader Joe’s gift card. That’s a decent amount of Tofu Edamame Nuggets.

I’ve been going to the Trader Joe’s a few blocks away about once a week ever since I moved into my new place last summer. Every week I brought my own bag. Every week I got a raffle ticket. And every week I’d check my ticket from the week before to see if I’d won.

Every week I was a loser.

But. Every week when I saw that I’d lost, I would say to the cashier, “I’m going to win the raffle one day. I just know it.” They would usually throw me a pity glance before bagging my pumpkin butter or cherry juice, smile politely, and give me a fresh ticket when I asked for one. I knew what they were thinking. They were thinking I’d never win. Because really, who does?

None of that stopped me from repeating the same procedure every week. Check last week’s ticket. Confirm that I lost. Announce that I would win one of these days. Receive new ticket. Become filled with hope all over again. That’s what being an eternal optimist is all about. No matter how many times you lose, no matter how many disappointments you encounter, you keep holding on to the hope that good things will come.

Which is exactly what happened.

Behold documentation of my winning raffle ticket. Not only did I truly believe I would eventually win the raffle, I repeated that belief over and over, week after week. Visualizing a goal and holding it close to your heart is important. But when you say the words, when you put your goal out there for others to hear, the Universe responds in even more profound ways. Our thoughts inspire words. Our words inspire actions. Everything is connected.

You have the power to score your own winning raffle ticket on a much larger scale. Whatever your heart’s desire is, let it be known to the world. Own it. Live it. Be vocal about your dreams. Never stop believing in your power to turn your dreams into reality.

The Universe is listening. What do you have to say?

board game nirvana

My fellow board gaming nerds will love this big news. There’s a new Monopoly token. One of the less popular tokens was replaced with a shiny new design. The iron is out. I never really liked the iron anyway. Or the shoe. Maybe if it were a cute shoe. But the shoe was what you had to be if all the other tokens were already taken. Oh, and the thimble. Who wants to be the thimble? Get ready for this fresh choice. The shiny new token is a cat.

That cat looks awesome. He’ll be appearing in the new edition later this year. I am going to be on that cat so fast it will make the wheelbarrow spin.

Why do I love old-school board games so much? Not just because I have serious affection for everything old-school. Board gaming has always been one of my fave activities. I grew up playing Monopoly, Sorry!, Parcheesi, Clue, and the rest of the classics with my friends. That was back in the day before we had screens to stare at other than the TV. There’s something so nostalgic and happy about playing board games. Every time I play one, that warm fuzzy feeling comes rushing back.

That’s why I’m a grownup who belongs to a board gaming group. Not just any board gaming group. My group is hardcore. These guys play games I’d never even heard of. My fave is probably Asara. You get to build castles. As a Sometimes Princess, I appreciate the castle theme. I also love Puerto Rico and Settlers of Catan. Here’s Settlers in action:

These games take about three hours to play. Which is nothing compared to what a lot of the hardcore gamers play. They’ll spread out these elaborate boards that take up five tables with a dazzling array of pieces, cards, figures, puzzles, shards with magic powers…and one game will take like seven hours to play. These games require serious commitment. They require snack breaks. Lighting effects have even been known to occur.

So you can understand that most of these guys scoff when my friend Stephen busts out The Climbers:

Climbers is such a cute game. It’s not a board game, but we sneak it in before we get a group together for the main action. You have to use full blocks, half blocks, and ladders to be the highest guy standing at the end. The game ends when it’s impossible for anyone to get any higher. Of course I had to document the first time I played Climbers and won. My guy is the light blue one on the right. He is only a half block above the next highest guy. That was a tight game.

Sometimes in the park or wherever I’ll see little kids glued to their electronic devices who can’t even look up for three seconds to take in the world around them. It makes me sad. Sad that they’re not connecting with the Now. Sad that they’re missing all the real world action happening around them. It makes me sad to think that, by the time they’re teens, playing an old-school board game may be reduced to some archaic ritual their parents remember from back in the day.

I’ve made a pact with myself to do everything I can to encourage old-school activities. A winter night in playing Monopoly, drinking hot chocolate with extra marshmallows, and talking to friends in real life instead of through a screen might seem boring. But being fully present in the Now and connecting to people in an authentic way are two things we should do every day.

And if kids are reluctant to turn away from the screen? There’s always a shiny new cat token to shake things up.

home life – view

This will be my last home life post. Thanks for all of your encouragement and support during the renovation process. And thanks for your sweet comments! I know most of us haven’t met in person, but I feel like I know you. Your enthusiasm has made me even more excited about my shiny new home.

In case you missed any of the before and after pictures, here’s a listing of the posts:

• Home life – bathroom
• Home life – bookshelves
• Home life – office
• Home life – kitchen
• Home life – bedroom
• Home life – walk-in closet
• Home life – front closet

One thing I knew I absolutely had to have in my new home was an epic view. Not necessarily the kind of epic where you can see across Manhattan to the river from the 27th floor. I turned that place down. Not the easiest decision. The sunsets were unreal. But I knew I wanted more space. My view is epic in its own unique way. It’s a very West Village type view. You can see glittery city lights at night, which I love. It just feels like home. The best part is being able to see lots of sky. Last time I had big sky views was 17 years ago when I moved to New York. I had a tiny studio in Chelsea. That place was so small the kitchen was actually a converted closet. But there were two big windows with southern exposure and unobstructed views. Happy sunshine all day. So when I saw this place with its wall of five big windows and southern exposure, I knew we were meant to be. The sunshine is epic. The view is epic:

I mean, hello. Clock towers and old churches and big trees and chimneys? All of this and a personal water tower? Sold.

Other windows have more sweet views:

You know I’m into astronomy and meteorology. I love those sciences so much I used to teach them. Now I can admire some of my fave constellations. I can watch storm systems roll in. And the moonlight. The moonlight…

I know it’s not the biggest of big sky views. But I grew up in the country. Been there. Seen that. What makes my view so epic is that it’s right here in New York. In downtown Manhattan where these kinds of views are super rare. That’s why it took me three years to find this place. Most of the apartments I saw had windows only looking at walls. Or windows facing the neighbor’s windows in the next building like three feet away. I can’t tell you how hard it was to find a place with views plus windows in the bathroom and kitchen, which were also important to me. So you can imagine how stoked out of my mind I am.

Looking for the right home is like looking for a boyfriend. Neither will have everything you want. But if your heart is happy, you’ll know it’s meant to be.

Thanks for joining me on this journey

home life – front closet

How many of you remember the front closet door drama that raged on for five months after I moved in? Show of hands. Now let’s review. There’s a coat/utility/storage closet near the front door that was in desperate need of new doors when I bought my apartment. I knew the original doors had to go. I just didn’t know having new doors made would take so freaking long. But they are magnificent. Def worth the wait.

Here’s the front closet before picture:

Those sliding slatted doors were not working for me. The closet space was basically one long hanging rod and two overhead shelves. An outrageous waste of space. I could not start sketching designs fast enough. You’ll also note the second closet on the other side of the front door. At first I was like, “Sweet, two big closets!” But my architect was like, “Um, no, we should take that other closet out to create a grand foyer.” How right he was.

This was the second closet after being ripped out:

Then the front closet was gutted:

I worked with the same designer who did the walk-in closet. She determined the best measurements for a coat rod, several shelves for supplies, overhead storage shelves, a cubby for my floor cleaner, and an area with hooks for hanging my gym bag, scarves, and umbrellas.

Here’s the completed front closet and grand foyer:

Were we done? No. No, we were not. Because this whole time I thought the custom doors were almost finished, my carpenter was still waiting for special hinges to be made. You know hinges are special when they take two months to make. The closet doors were not going to have a frame. They were going to hang on pivot hinges. They were going to be spray painted glossy white. They were going to be magnificent.

If they ever got here.

This was the front closet situation for five months after I moved in:

The funny thing? Is that people who came over didn’t even realize this was supposed to be a closet. I kept insisting that doors were coming. They kept nodding like you do with crazy people who insist their imaginary friend is coming to dinner so you better set an extra place. Some lost hope that the closet doors would ever arrive. But I kept hope alive. First the doors were supposed to be installed, but the carpenter’s assistant put the latch pulls on backwards. Then they were supposed to be installed, but they needed another coat of paint to correct for the latch pull debacle. Then Sandy happened. My carpenter’s studio was flooded. He sent me a photo of the doors to confirm that they existed, but were being held hostage:

Finally the doors were brought over! Were they painted yet? No. No, they were not. They were only visiting for a few hours to make sure they fit:

Saying goodbye was not easy. I couldn’t wait to see them again and welcome the painted doors home for good. They were whisked away to be painted…oh yeah, then the whole latch pull/Sandy/flooding/repainting happened. Sorry, the timeline got a little foggy there. In the end, the front closet doors were installed in their full magnificence.

Finally…the after photo we’ve all been waiting for!

The doors are solid maple with a layer of MDF to achieve that glossy shine. Each door is about 150 pounds. The doors pivot on those special hinges so smoothly they don’t even make a sound. My architect wanted me to go with latch pulls instead of doorknobs for a streamlined look. Am I happy with the doors? Hells yeah. Windex is pretty, but I really didn’t need to look at the bottle like it was part of a sculpture called No Closet Doors anymore.

Oh yeah. If you’re wondering why my grand foyer doesn’t look all that grand, allow me to kindly remind you that this is downtown Manhattan. A foyer measuring four square feet is quite grand. Just being able to open the front door all the way is a luxury. Oh, it’s fancy up in here. No doubt.

home life – walk-in closet

One of the things that struck me about my new apartment the first time I saw it was its similarity to Carrie Bradshaw’s apartment. We have the same bedroom/walk-in closet/bathroom configuration. Since I live in reality, my bedroom/walk-in closet/bathroom are smaller than hers. But we all love relating to Carrie.

Getting to design my own walk-in closet had been a big dream of mine since I was little. You guys know what an organization freak I am. Organizing is my idea of good times. Friends even invite me over to organize their closets. For reals. Which is why I was beyond stoked to transform my original closet into streamlined, customized bliss. Here’s the before picture of the right side of the walk-in closet:

What we have here is a classic New York City closet. Complete with classic New York City problems. This entire right side was essentially two hanging rods and an overhead shelf. Shoes were scattered on the floor. Scattered, people. Not even on shoe shelves. The previous owner had a dresser on the left side of the closet with a mirror over it. That’s about it. There was so much wasted space I kind of felt bad for him. Then I remembered the insane profit he was making on the apartment. I didn’t feel bad for him anymore.

The entire closet had to be gutted. I wanted to create built-ins from floor to ceiling on both sides to maximize storage space. Here’s the left side during demolition:

And the right side, featuring my bathroom door. Remember that first week after I moved in when I was living with my team of contractors and no bathroom door? That was a super fun bonding experience. Here’s where the bathroom door lived:

I worked with a wonderful designer who sat with me for hours, perfecting each millimeter of space. She took my initial sketches of both sides of the closet and calculated the exact measurements for the cubbies, cabinets, drawers, and hanging rod areas. For the left side, we started with the measurements of a hamper I saw at The Container Store and immediately had to have. It’s shiny white, large, and rolls. Sold. After we decided on the measurements for the hamper space, we figured out that I would have six clothes cabinets, four drawers, a sweater cubby, a large cabinet for supplies, and shoe cubbies right above the floor.

Here’s the after picture of the left side:

How much do I love this? The drawers make me feel extra fancy. The closet is deeper than it looks, so the cabinets go way back. The top cabinets go all the way to the ceiling. There’s tons of storage space. Well, tons by downtown Manhattan standards, anyway. It’s pretty sweet to be able to buy the big Method soap jug to refill the little dispensers. And, like, more than one of something on sale.

The right side is for hanging clothes with shelf space at the top and shoe cubbies on the bottom. I wanted two rods for hanging tops, plus a smaller rod just for dresses. Here’s the right side after picture, facing toward the bedroom:

Do I feel like Carrie Bradshaw every time I walk through my closet? Most def. But would Carrie want to live here? No way. Where would her shoes go?